Hey! Please don't call me Sir

It has been a long time, since I posted my last blog. Nevertheless, it’s better to be late than never :-)

Today, I am picking a simple but debatable question – “Is using the terms “Sir” and “Ma’am” appropriate, outdated or condescending?”

Remembering my Sainik School days, we used these terms (also referred as salutation) for my teachers and seniors (even if they are just one class senior to me). Even now, I use it while communicating with them. For sure, the purpose of using such salutations is to show respect for others and we are taught to use them since our childhood. This is inherent in our Indian culture.

Having said that, there is another aspect to it as well. Nowadays, in most of MNCs (I am talking about corporate culture) in and outside India, it is always preferred to call any junior or senior colleague by first name. The terms like Sir and Ma’am are not encouraged. It symbolizes that “everyone is equal” – if you look from this perspective, isn’t it a great thought? If someone is called by his/her name, it makes the conversation professional yet cordial.

While I was discussing on this subject with a colleague, I got another point of view regarding avoidance of using salutations. I would like to share it – Consider a scenario in a corporate company, where one employee is using the salutation in front of his senior and another is not. It may not be true for everyone, but in general, some seniors may tend to put the former in his/her good books unintentionally whereas keeping the latter out of it – it is quite natural. But, it may affect the real assessment of two employees in above example.

Also, I found a humorous reason for using name instead of Sir/Ma’am – Some people take it as an offense when addressed as Sir/Ma’am; usually the complaint is that the term is an indicative of older age :-)
I think the usage of these terms is not outdated or inappropriate; it actually depends on the situation and for how long you know the person. The key is “Adapt to your surroundings”.
  • In case you don’t know someone and approaching him/her for the first time, addressing with salutation might help in establishing the initial repo to start the conversation. If you know the name of person, using Mr. or Mrs. along with last name will be better option as usage of Sir/Ma’am is little controversial. But, you should not use Mr. or Mrs. in case you are not sure about gender of the person :-)
  • There can also be some cases where one doesn’t know the name of person, where one can refer with salutation.
  • Talking about workplace, it depends on work culture of the company. We should work according to the work culture. In most of the IT companies, as we know, referring anyone senior or junior by name is preferred and we should follow the same.
  • If, however, you are a new graduate, on a job interview, using the terms would be respectful and appropriate.
That’s it for today. Feel free to provide your thoughts..

Published on my official blog on 12 Sep 2013

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